What did the paper say to the pencil?

I broke my finger!

What's the friendliest pen?

What is the emptiest holiday?

It's allergy season again?

Why do potted plants shower so much in April?

What do people drink when they're feeling under the weather?

Why did the squid go to the office supplies store?

What do you call an argument where two cats are too proud to concede?

Why do airplanes make bad spouses?

Why are dogs allowed on airplanes?

Why did Dr. Frankenstein invite his monster over for dinner?

Where does a veterinarian's husband sleep when they're fighting?

What game does a rabbit always win?

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?